So around 3:15 p.m. on Saturday, March 8, 2020, I received an email from firstname.lastname@example.org saying I had gotten $250.00 from a Jeremy Fontenot. I found that strange considering I don’t know any Jeremy Fontenots and when I looked at details the email was addressed to email@example.com not my Jamie.firstname.lastname@example.org so why did it go to my gmail? Even stranger, the person wrote “for tickets” in the details for the transaction. What tickets? I wasn’t selling any tickets or anything. I was faced with a moral decision to make..”Do I keep the money even though I know it wasn’t intended for me even though I could really use it?” or “Do I do the right thing, email the person, tell them the mixup and send the money back?” I did what I would want someone to do if it was me, I emailed them and then returned the money to them, even though I really (really, really, really) wanted to keep it. I did however get something out of it; not monitary, but something much better- Pride in myself, and I got a compliment from the individual in an email, “Thank you so much. I really appreciate your kind heart in this situation. It could’ve gone in a negative direction, but because of you, it was very nice. This gives me one more example to tell of how there are great people in this world. I hope you have a fantastic day and blessings your way. By the way, I told my cousin that since yall emails are so close, I advised him to change it up a little so this confusion doesn’t happen again. Y’all already have the same name! LOL.” and I emailed back, telling him “LOL, Only difference really is I am female. I’ve been scammed out of money before, so I get it and I’m disabled so I guess I have a lot of empathy I guess, I dont know. Anyway thanks for the compliments. Would I liked $250 ,sure who wouldn’t? But Keeping it wouldn’t be right. Anyway God bless and If you would like to know more about my life and story, I have 2 blog pages and a youtube channel,” and gave him the links to them. He emailed back saying ” I will definitely look at your youtube and read about your story.” So I possibly got a new online follower out of it 🙂
There’s been a mutual decision between David Piazza and I after all of us discussing things over with Mom, to push the wedding back another year. So it’ll be may 2021.. we haven’t gotten much done as far as planning and in Catholics churches, need to let church priests know 6 months ahead of event.. That’d be next month, plus we’ll be moving into my parents’ house the beginning of 2020. Plus this way, I’ll be over a year post-op and better able to plan and enjoy it. Sorry for any disappointments but tis life ❤️❤️❤️🤷 we feel this will be better in long run.
Today I had my monthly appointment with pain management doctor in Vidalia, Louisiana. At my last appointment, they did a bone density test; today they went over the results and it turns out I am developing Osteoporosis. They did not say where it was developing and I was too in shock to ask. I have it written down for next month’s appointment. The doctors are starting me on Fosamax to increase my bone density and hopefully help to where I am not as “brittle” for surgery time in August.
In other news, we have my fiance’s niece for a couple days at the apartment. 🙂 she is always a pretty good distraction for my pain. Tonight, we made tacos for supper 🙂 Another good bit of news is my fiance and I will start praying the rosary together every night and gonna start going back to church on sundays #RelationshipsWithGodlastLonger 🙂
A bad storm passed through Louisiana this week so it has been quite a bit of sleepless nights for me lately and then add in the dreaded once a month bullshit us females have to deal with, adding in stress, anxiety, hormones, emotional roller coaster, all that (sarcastic tone) “fun.” Tonight, I tossed and turned for 2 hours while my fiance’ just lays next to me snoring; sure, I could wake him up and make him suffer with me, but that is selfish plus he works to provide for us, so I guess he needs the sleep more than I do, but it sure would be nice to be able to talk these things out instead of blogging them.
I have a mattress that can elevate the head, it helps with migraines and sometimes my upper back (then I gotta deal with my lower back and hips hurting), but tonight my upper back is hurting and I am not even gonna use the head-elevation because lately it has been making my fiance’ back hurt in the morning; which sent me down the dreaded “rabbit hole” of the uncertainty of a future together: What if I become bed-ridden, what if he has to help me with everything more than he does now? That isn’t what he signed on for! It isn’t fair to him. I know he made a commitment to me and he constantly reminds me of it anytime I start crying and freaking out about how much pain I am in and the fears that sends into me about how uncertain my life and future are; I just don’t want him to have regrets or resentments. I love him, I really do, but when these fears kick in, I go into flight mode and tend to push him away, thinking I am saving him from being stuck in a sucky future with me and my damn disability. How can I expect him to accept it and what it does to me, if I cant even accept it completely myself?
If there was a pill created to make me “normal,” like everyone else in society, I would take it! Even though I also feel like having my disability has made me a well-rounded, wise, empathetic, compassionate, supportive, loyal, passionate person. Does it make me a bad person? Why is it I can be a support system and cheerleader for others with disabilities but yet I cant even accept myself completely? Does it make me a hypocrite? Maybe its just the pain talking; well the pain and the damn devil. I need to really work on myself and loving myself for me; whole-y and completely. Maybe after my surgery to fix my rods, maybe my pain will be better, and I can start being happy again. One can only hope.
Today I got a text from Mom in concern with my grandmother, my “Mommie.” She told me, ” Catholic daughters went pray rosary at hospital for mommie this morning. She opened her eyes, recognized them & even prayed some of the rosary with them. They moved her back to the nursing home this afternoon “
At least she is opening her eyes, recognized them, and even prayed some of the rosary with them.” We aren’t out of the woods yet, so prayers for our family is still appreciated. Thanks.
The dance from Summer 2018- I did the best I could. I don’t have the best coordination, but the main purpose of the counselors doing the dance isn’t to “perfect,” but to help teach our class the dance moves and encourage participation, which it did. So mission accomplished.